I Swallowed My Wedding Ring, Part 2.

I returned home from the hospital a few hours ago. It was a minor procedure. Since my own digestive system was incapable of removing my wedding ring I had to rely on modern medical techniques to do so. I was subjected to a metallic probe (with a camera) that was inserted in my anus and then loitered around my intestines until the wedding ring was found stuck in a pocket of my colon. The probe delicately latched on to the ring, dragging it out from my system in the same manner that a baby would be removed from the womb. The pain was slight since I was heavily sedated (and still am) and I was kept in the hospital for a night following the procedure to make sure my colon did not go into frenetic spasms.

My Doctor has asked me to spend the next few days in bed. He wants me to drink plenty of fluids and remain lying on my back for at least twenty hours a day. His concern is that since my wedding ring was stuck in a very narrow pocket of my colon there was some bruising done. The colon is a very sensitive organ and his fear is that it may become swollen as a result of the trauma. This is why I am only allowed to eat fruit and drink water for the next week. When I was leaving the hospital my Doctor asked me if I had learned anything from this experience. “I have learned to keep my wedding ring out of my mouth,” I said. He looked at me as if he was waiting for a more insightful reply. Did you learn anything else?” he patiently asked. I thought for a moment and replied- “to love and care for my wife for the rest of my life.” This answer came from some place deep in my gut, rather than from my mind. It was as if the Doctor had implanted in me the knowledge that I had been given a second chance to make my marriage work. “Swallowing your wedding ring may have been a blessing for your marriage,” the Doctor said with a smile and then disappeared from my room. As my wife pushed me in my wheelchair out from the hospital I could not stop telling her how much I loved her.

I am still very tired and must return back to bed. I have only gotten up to write this brief entry. I wanted to let you know that this terrible story has had a happy ending. Even though I am still high on various pain medications, my wedding ring is back upon the safe confines of finger. My wife has been caring for me and despite my weak condition- we have made love twice. I have pledged my renewed love to her over and over and thanked the heavens above that this chapter in my life has had a good ending. While lying in bed I have often thought about what would of happened had I never swallowed my wedding ring? I may have not just lost my wife, but also this love which now floods my heart- in holly matrimony ofcourse.

8 thoughts on “I Swallowed My Wedding Ring, Part 2.

  1. Another happy ending. 20 hours of bed rest heh, just for a small probe, you are delicate. Fascinating tale, full of rich symbolism.

  2. I am howling laughing at Paul’s comment.

    I am glad it all worked out okay, but on a diet of fruit and water you will burn out pretty fast if you keep on having sex.

  3. I heard about you. My husband actually told me about your wedding ring. I must admit I was actually quite jealous when finding out that you swallowed yours. I know that sounds sick but at least you knew where it went.:)

    I never take my ring off unless I am cooking something like meatloaf. I never realized how much that little circle of love meant to me until I lost it.

    I am glad you got yours back. Maybe one of these days I will have mine back on my hand. If not I guess my husband and I will have to have a renewal ceremony with new rings. LOL

    Thanks for sharing your story.

  4. oh, i have found the answer. should of just kept it all on one post. good to hear the ring is safe …. for now . is there a need to say “dont try this at home” and that your a trained professional? lol

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