I returned home from the hospital a few hours ago. It was a minor procedure. Since my own digestive system was incapable of removing my wedding ring I had to rely on modern medical techniques to do so. I was subjected to a metallic probe (with a camera) that was inserted in my anus and then loitered around my intestines until the wedding ring was found stuck in a pocket of my colon. The probe delicately latched on to the ring, dragging it out from my system in the same manner that a baby would be removed from the womb. The pain was slight since I was heavily sedated (and still am) and I was kept in the hospital for a night following the procedure to make sure my colon did not go into frenetic spasms.
My Doctor has asked me to spend the next few days in bed. He wants me to drink plenty of fluids and remain lying on my back for at least twenty hours a day. His concern is that since my wedding ring was stuck in a very narrow pocket of my colon there was some bruising done. The colon is a very sensitive organ and his fear is that it may become swollen as a result of the trauma. This is why I am only allowed to eat fruit and drink water for the next week. When I was leaving the hospital my Doctor asked me if I had learned anything from this experience. “I have learned to keep my wedding ring out of my mouth,” I said. He looked at me as if he was waiting for a more insightful reply. Did you learn anything else?” he patiently asked. I thought for a moment and replied- “to love and care for my wife for the rest of my life.” This answer came from some place deep in my gut, rather than from my mind. It was as if the Doctor had implanted in me the knowledge that I had been given a second chance to make my marriage work. “Swallowing your wedding ring may have been a blessing for your marriage,” the Doctor said with a smile and then disappeared from my room. As my wife pushed me in my wheelchair out from the hospital I could not stop telling her how much I loved her.
I am still very tired and must return back to bed. I have only gotten up to write this brief entry. I wanted to let you know that this terrible story has had a happy ending. Even though I am still high on various pain medications, my wedding ring is back upon the safe confines of finger. My wife has been caring for me and despite my weak condition- we have made love twice. I have pledged my renewed love to her over and over and thanked the heavens above that this chapter in my life has had a good ending. While lying in bed I have often thought about what would of happened had I never swallowed my wedding ring? I may have not just lost my wife, but also this love which now floods my heart- in holly matrimony ofcourse.
10 thoughts on “I Swallowed My Wedding Ring, Part 2.”
That is fantastic! I’m so glad everything worked out for you. My wife is still looking for her wedding ring, but at least you didn’t have to mush through 10 pounds of dog poo!
I can’t believe we had to go through dog poo
Another happy ending. 20 hours of bed rest heh, just for a small probe, you are delicate. Fascinating tale, full of rich symbolism.
I am howling laughing at Paul’s comment.
I am glad it all worked out okay, but on a diet of fruit and water you will burn out pretty fast if you keep on having sex.
Yikes! But I’m glad you had a good ending. Yer a very good writer!
I heard about you. My husband actually told me about your wedding ring. I must admit I was actually quite jealous when finding out that you swallowed yours. I know that sounds sick but at least you knew where it went.:)
I never take my ring off unless I am cooking something like meatloaf. I never realized how much that little circle of love meant to me until I lost it.
I am glad you got yours back. Maybe one of these days I will have mine back on my hand. If not I guess my husband and I will have to have a renewal ceremony with new rings. LOL
Thanks for sharing your story.
So u had to dig thru ur shit for 2 days :S
oh, i have found the answer. should of just kept it all on one post. good to hear the ring is safe …. for now . is there a need to say “dont try this at home” and that your a trained professional? lol
I think I’ve seen this story somewhere before. Was it….
I can’t wait for the exciting conclusion in part II!
Me too ! A bit weird ……
So, um, this is awkward. I’m glad I stumbled across your story because I kinda sorta accidentally swallowed my ring yesterday (don’t know if anyone actually wants to hear that story). I wasn’t sure of what to do, but this story helped give me an idea of what to consider doing. I was relieved though because I “retrieved” my ring back this morning and everything turned out fine for me, but I was concerned about what could happen since I also came across the “Man Dies After Swallowing Ring” article… Now that I’ve gotten through this experience myself, in a weird way I find it was a funny and interesting experience to go through now that I could laugh about it. But for the most part I’m just glad it went good for me and nothing bad came as a result of the incident. However, I’m more glad that you came out of this experience fine as well with what you’ve shared with us happened during your case.